Yesterday, ALDR started our New Mexico Standards Based Assessment (NMSBA), the state test that the children are required to take according to No Child Left Behind (NLCB) in order to access whether or not we've made Adequate Yearly Progress (AYP). Whew...that was way too many acronyms! AYP is a powerful number. At best, if we have good numbers, we'll get some monies from the state to continue improving and at worst we'll be closed down because our numbers are so bad.
Thankfully the latter can't happen to us just yet as we haven't been open long enough. This year is our last “free pass” so to speak. Last year, we did alright. We passed in reading and came close in math. Our math scores did double, which was great and gave me some much needed confidence in our mathematics curriculum.
The kids have three weeks of testing. 12 days of awfulness. It starts at 8:30 and should only last until 10:00, but there are days, like yesterday that it can last until 11:00. It's hard because all the kids can be be done except one and the others can't move or talk until everyone is finished. So some kids can be sitting (reading if they choose) for up to an hour and forty five minutes. They have three days of reading, three days of math, two days of writing and three days of science.
It's a lot of work for them. And it's tiring. So after the testing, the rest of the day is sort of shot. Their eyes are glazed over. They can't focus. They are exhausted. This year, I have the fourth graders after the test until 1:00 and the third graders from 1:00 – 3:00. I have each group do some math, usually something fun and hands on and then let them watch an episode of Planet Earth or Seas of Life for some brain rest time.
I have nine fourth graders to test. What about the other four you ask? Well, two are severe special ed and so need one on one testing and two are mild special ed and so need small group testing. Because I only have nine students in my room, it was decided that I didn't need a proctor. This at first was fine with me, because all my proctors have done in the past is sit there and read a book while I do all the work. This did however mean, that if anything went wrong I was going to be in a tough spot as children are not to be left alone while testing.
As I mentioned earlier, my classroom is in an interesting spot in the school. This makes it very difficult to begin testing because there are so many people going back and forth between the rooms that it's hard to tell when everyone is where they are supposed to be for the next two to three hours. The other two classrooms also have outside access so you'd think that people (Mr. Rama a.k.a. my least favorite person at school) would realize that they don't have to interrupt testing to get from place to place. To deter errant people walking through my room during testing (which according to the test directions is expressly forbidden) I began locking two out of the four doors in my room.
Yesterday, as it was the first day there were the first day kinks to get out. ALL of the directions had to be read aloud to the students and two sample questions had to be worked through before the students could even begin. There were 26 questions in first session of the reading test. I think the students really struggled with it and put a lot of time and effort into what they wrote and how they answered. They asked questions that I wasn't allowed to answer, but that showed me they were really thinking. They weren't getting all the questions right, but I was impressed with how hard they were trying.
Today was an entirely different experience. We were able to get started on time for the most part, which was nice. There were only 16 questions. (Now, why they didn't let the kids get their feet wet with less questions on the first day is beyond me.) About five minutes after I had set them to begin, Jamie raised his hand. This child is so quite and so shy, I was surprised. I walked over and he told me he didn't feel good. I asked him what he wanted to do about it, my usual response to that question. He couldn't even get the answer out before he began to throw up. So I rushed him to the door. Which was locked. Just as I got it unlocked, vomit sprayed over my back and left arm. Lovely.
I opened the door, stood in the door way (you know, because I didn't have a proctor and couldn't leave the room) and grabbed the nearest garbage can. Jamie continued to throw up. The Kindergarten kids came by on their way to morning water break. I asked their teacher, Ms. Betty to run to the admin office and get someone to come help because I couldn't leave the room while the kids were testing. The office person came and said she was going to get the custodian. Which left me still standing in my doorway with vomit all over my back. Custodian came cleaned up and we sent Jamie to the office. The office person was able to give me a shirt, luckily Jamie missed my pants. (It was really nice of him.) She stood in the doorway of my room while I ran to the bathroom to clean my arm and change.
The students had 16 questions and three passages to read today and they were finished in about 30 minutes in. They did not spend any where near the amount of time on the questions today that they did yesterday. We aren't even allowed to point out to students if they've missed one. I was so upset as I walked around and realized that some students weren't even writing complete sentences for most of the short answer questions. They know how to do that. We've worked on it all year. They just want to be done with the test. (Frankly, I don't blame them.) I walked back upstairs to talk to return the tests to Sr. Callejo and mentioned how discouraged I was. You know what he said? “Encourage them to write more.” Ok. Seriously. Duh. I did that. But that was all the advice he had for me.
I heard an awful story yesterday from the current second grade teacher that was assigned to test the seventh graders. Ms. Billings is a lovely teacher, she does a great job and she's always willing to go the extra mile even though her life outside of school isn't easy. She was telling me that the seventh graders basically refused to take the test. They found it too difficult and threw their test booklets and answer documents on the floor. They told her that if they didn't pass it didn't really matter because it was her fault because she didn't teach them right. (She's the second grade teacher...she hasn't even spent a single day with them. Haha, lucky woman.) She was horrified at their lack of disrespect and their inability to do anything without complaining about it first. I wasn't at all surprised. They were awful to me last year as I've written about on many occasions.
I put that sentence in bold for two reasons. The first because she isn't their teacher and hasn't spent anytime with them and it shows the amount of maturity these kids lack, the second is the sentiment itself. More and more it is becoming apparent to me that my job is going to start depending on these scores. What with the firing of an entire staff at a Rhode Island school, the firing of an entire staff in Georgia and the idea flooding public schools across the country that students and parents should be more in control of what happens at a school than teachers. This really worries me and makes me wish that I was trained for something other than teaching, you know so that when all the shit hits the fan, I would at least have a back up.
It seems 100 percent unfair to me that my job should depend on these scores. Maybe in middle class suburban neighborhoods and others that are more affluent. Maybe. The odds that are stacked against my students (and therefore me) are tremendous. Lack of English Language proficiency, poverty, parents that work 24 – 7, students that come to school but decide not to learn no matter what we do, parents that take their students out of school early ALL the time, parents that don't bother helping us with disciplinary issues, parents that bring their children an hour late EVERY day and the school not having enough money to provide us with what we need to teach these children all play into how well the students learn.
And it's not only these everyday things. There's also the children that come to use a month before testing is to begin, like Eliza in the third grade, from a different school, already behind. We are still responsible for that child's scores. You know why she moved schools so late in the year? Her father passed away suddenly. Guess who found him at the bottom of their hot tub. Eliza. Tell me how can we expect her to be able to do her best? Or what about the pair the sisters (both of whom I've taught, but have in the classroom this year) that lost their father suddenly over the past weekend. We are held responsible for those scores as well. And yet these children should not even expected to perform under these conditions.
How can it 100 percent my fault when the students don't test well even when the kids have been here all year? Today alone, Jamie threw up at the beginning of the test. He's going to have to go back and re-do it. Fred, after missing all last week, (when we did review and prep for these tests) (not that was the only prep and review, but still) didn't get home from El Paso until after midnight last night. He was half asleep as he was working on the test and he won't be able to go back and look at it again. How is that my fault?
Now don't get me wrong. I think teachers should be held to a very high standard. I work to meet that standard every single day. I think teachers should be educated in what we teach, I think we should constantly reflect on how well we are doing, I think principals should be in classrooms observing, checking on student learning and giving the teacher feedback weekly. I also think teachers should be paid as if they are professionals and that schools should be castles.
Lots of things get in the way of this ideal. Principals (not mine, though today he didn't have very good advice), the government, teachers' unions (my opinions on that are definitely a whole other post) bad teachers and of course students and parents. We ALL need to do better. I'm doing my part and I know there are other fantastic teachers out there that are doing their part. At some point all that has to add up to something.
Nice moment of the day: I got a quick note from one of the girls that did the same Masters' program that I did in Bennington. She ran into one of the students, Kim from the class that I student taught in back in 2005 – 2006 year who wanted to know what I was up to. Which really warmed my heart. Exactly what I needed to bring my spirits up a few hours after being thrown up on.
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